why should a woman or a man go to a monastery.

Making the decision to enter a monastery is not easy, such an act is one of the sharpest turns in the life of every person. The reasons for this can be very different. In order to achieve this goal, all those who have firmly decided to link their lives with the church must pass certain tests.

Achieving this goal can be divided into three stages:

• receiving a blessing;
• entering a monastery as a novice;
• a tonsured monk.

A blessing

Many citizens perceive entering a monastery as an escape from an ordinary, peaceful life. Usually such a decision is made for many reasons, but the end result is always the same. A young man in monastic robes seems out of place to many uninitiated, where he ends up. He seems to want to live and let live. However, this is not entirely true. The holy father, who has to bless a person to enter the monastery, as a rule, talks to the person who comes to him for a very long time, looking very carefully to understand what the real purpose of such a decision is. After receiving the blessing, a person who wants to become a novice can move forward on his way to the Church and to the Lord. However, if the priest decides that the subject is not yet ready for such a step, he should surrender and at least temporarily abandon his decision.

Reception for beginners

After the blessing, the spiritual mentor can advise which monastery is best to go to. After her permission, you need to talk to the abbess of the monastery to get her consent for the novitiate. Novices live in a monastery, fast, work, pray to the Lord, study the Bible, etc.

Such a period in the life of a beginner can sometimes last up to 10 years. During this period, some change their decision to enter the monastery and return to secular life. Often you can get an offer to be a worker, that is, to help the monastery at work, and only after that to become a novice.

tonsure

In fact, tonsure is already a rite of passage for becoming a monk. The tonsure is like a symbol that gives evidence of further service only to the Lord. There are currently 3 stages in the monastery. Ryasophor (Rassophore monk) is the first and preparatory step before accepting a small scheme, after which the monk takes a vow of obedience, chastity and non-covetousness. After taking a vow in which the monk renounces all worldly things, the former novice becomes a schema monk (or monk of the great schema, an angel figure).

People go to the monastery for various reasons – tiredness from the hustle and bustle of the world, atonement for sins, self-improvement, struggle with temptations in the world. But we must clearly understand that this important choice must…

Having described the structure of services, it is worth asking one extremely important question – perhaps the central one of this book. The question was formulated by one of the readers of the first version of this book before it was published…

Let’s look at the most frequently celebrated day of the night – Sunday. It is served on Sunday eve, Saturday evening. The day of most holidays is very similar in structure to Sunday, with rare exceptions…

The desire to serve God can arise at any age, but most often such a feeling arises after a strong desire. Some men just realized that ordinary life does not interest them and they have a great desire to help others. In such a situation, information about how to go to the monastery and what is needed for it will come in handy. First, you need to go to a church or monastery for a conversation with a priest to decide whether this is a deliberate decision or not.

How can a man go to a monastery?

First, you must regularly attend services, as well as confession and communion. You should find your spiritual mentor to help you make the right decision. If you do not have the strength and desire to go to the morning service, then most likely you will not be able to adhere to the monastic regime. Sometimes going to a monastery and making a pilgrimage is enough to help you find peace without giving up your normal life forever.

How to go to the monastery:

1. First, stay as a worker in the monastery. By doing hard physical work, you can decide if you are ready to live like this for the rest of your days.
2. The next level is beginner. To do this, you need to write a special request and get permission.
3. If you have successfully passed the several-year probationary period, you can already apply to become a monk from an abbot.

It is also important to know at what age one can enter the monastery. There is no specific restriction in this matter, but at the same time tonsure in the monastery is allowed only after 30 years. This is due to the fact that a person must make this decision responsibly, having life experience. Only those people who have lived in the monastery for at least 5 years are considered monks. If a person is not yet 18 years old, he must talk to the priest, get the blessing of the parents, and only then go to the monastery.Where is it better to live for a while first? Only after realizing that the decision is sincere and the limited monastic life is completely satisfactory, can one turn to the abbot.

It is also worth understanding this topic – is it possible to go to a monastery with a child. Church ministers, answering this question, give a negative answer, claiming that going to a monastery is a renunciation of the world and that the child must be fed, clothed, taught, etc. It is impossible to take care and fulfill obligations and at the same time detach from the world. In this case, there is only one solution – to come on a pilgrimage to a monastery and read prayers. Maybe God will send the right decision and turn in another direction.

How to become a novice in a monastery?

It is very easy to become a novice in a monastery. To do this, you need to choose a monastery where you want to serve God. After that, you need to talk to the Abbess. As a rule, no one is forbidden to test themselves in this field. In the beginning, you are just a worker, that is, a person who works for the monastery for the glory of God. During this time, the abbot will take a closer look at you and you will also understand if this is the right path. I know several women who spent several years in a monastery and only then became novices. Many people leave because they have their own understanding of what a monastery is and life in it. Often these ideas do not correspond to reality.

But if your path is to serve God in a monastery, it will succeed.

To begin with, you should become a monastery worker, to work for the glory of God, to test yourself in the obedience of the monastery: where they send you without objection. Yes, pray at the long monastic services that start at 4-5 am in some monasteries. Live among other people in a cell that can accommodate 10 or even more people at once. And everyone has their own character, attitude and habits. Go to confession with your confessor as often as possible, carefully picking out your sinful thoughts and actions from your past and present life. And with his blessing go to the sacrament of the Eucharist, preparing as you should.

And live naturally for more than one month! This is necessary in order to understand: is your love for God really higher than everything in this life and are you ready to leave everything for it?

In any case, the decision to stay in the monastery in any position is made primarily by the abbot of the given monastery after a personal conversation with the person!

I was a worker in the Vysotsky Monastery, Serpuhov, where the icon of the Inexhaustible Cup is located. I was there for three months. Work, prayers, work. You will definitely need a passport when you arrive at the monastery. That’s basically it. To become a novice in a monastery, only one thing is needed, your desire and faith in God.

In principle, you can simply come and ask to enter any monastery, if there are no canonical reasons for the ban: an undivorced marriage, the presence of minor children, the presence of state obligations (for example, an outstanding criminal record). A novice is already a member of a monastic community who can take monastic vows after a trial of several years (sometimes less). Before novices, you can simply go to work and work in monastic obedience. Workers and novices alike can then return to the world without any problems.

Most often, the desire to leave the world of routine and ordinary human passions forever by becoming a monk arises from a severe mental trauma and disappointment in one’s life. Indeed, sometimes unfulfilled plans, unfulfilled hopes, betrayal of loved ones or awareness of our shortcomings force us to desperate actions. And the desire to become a monk, while wonderful in itself, is often still a desperate move. Today we will talk about how a man can leave for a new life, how to prepare for a new life, and most importantly, how to understand that this is really what you need.

The most important thing to know before you ask the clergy to accept you into the monastery is that a person “from the street” who suddenly decided to renounce the worldly life will not immediately be accepted as a monk. You will be asked to complete a fairly long probationary period, which may last several years. This is necessary not only so that the clergy are convinced of the purity of your intentions; the trial period is needed above all for you.

When a believer attends services and spends some time in the monastery, he may feel that the life of monks is one of peace, peace of mind, confidence in the future and justice. He feels exalted and happy, so the desire to stay in the monastery forever seems quite natural. However, in reality, everything is not so simple. But let’s talk about everything in order. First of all, let’s see what preparation steps must be completed in order to start a new life as an Orthodox monk:

It is also worth considering that people over 30 are accepted into the monastery much more easily. This is due to the fact that at this age a person already has a certain life experience, so his decisions are more informed. In addition, you must live in a monastery for at least five years before becoming a monk. In such a long time, you will see for sure whether you are really ready to live the rest of your days, following a strict routine and giving up everything worldly. If a very young man wants to enter a monastery, his parents’ permission is needed.

The Church is always ready to receive into its flock people who sincerely want to devote their lives to serving God. However, certain restrictions apply to those whose intentions are not so pure, who have important unfinished business in worldly life, and people who have made a decision due to an unstable emotional state. Let’s look at some examples:

The most important thing is a sincere desire to commit. Before entering the monastery, a man must make sure that nothing in the world holds him back, that no one depends on him, that he is ready to humbly fulfill all the demands of the monastery management and accept his new life. It is important to understand that monastic work is not only peace, quiet and prayer, it is also a constant struggle with one’s own pride.

The novice Timofey (Timote Suladze in the world) dreamed of becoming a bishop, but life in the monastery changed his plans, forcing him to start all over again.

First attempt

I visited the monastery several times. The first wish came when I was 14 years old. Then I lived in Minsk, studied in the first year of music school. I had just started going to church and asked to sing in the cathedral choir. In the shop of a church in Minsk, I accidentally came across a detailed biography of St. Seraphim of Sarov – a thick book, about 300 pages. I read it in one go and immediately wanted to follow the saint’s example.

Soon I had the opportunity to visit several Belarusian and Russian monasteries as a guest and pilgrim. In one of them, I made friends with the brothers, who at that time consisted of only two monks and one novice. Since then, I periodically came to live in this monastery. Due to various reasons, including my young age, I could not fulfill my dream during those years.

The second time I thought about monasticism was years later. For several years I chose between different monasteries – from St. Petersburg to mountain monasteries in Georgia. I went there to visit and had a closer look. Finally, he chose the St. Elias Monastery of the Odessa Diocese of the Moscow Patriarchate, where he entered as a novice. By the way, we met with his deputy and talked for a long time in one of the social networks before the real meeting.

Monastic life

Having crossed the threshold of the monastery with my belongings, I realized that worries and doubts were behind me: I was at home, now a difficult, but understandable and bright life, full of spiritual achievements, awaits me. It was quiet happiness.

The monastery is located right in the center of the city. We were free to leave the territory for a short time. You could even go to the sea, but for a longer stay you had to get permission from the governor or the provost. If you needed to leave the city, permission had to be in writing. The fact is that there are many impostors who put on robes and pretend to be clergymen, monks or novices, but at the same time have nothing to do with either clergy or monasticism. These people go around towns and villages collecting donations. The permission received from the monastery was a kind of shield: just a little, without problems, you could prove that you belonged, really.

I had a separate cell in the monastery itself, and I am grateful to the governor for that. Most novices and even some monks lived alone. All amenities were on the floor. The building was always clean and tidy. This was monitored by the monastery’s civilian employees: cleaners, laundresses and other workers. All household needs were abundantly met: we could eat well in the fraternity house and they turned a blind eye to the fact that we also had our own food in the cell.

I felt great joy when something delicious was served in the canteen! For example, red fish, caviar, good wine. Meat products were not consumed in the common refectory, but we were not forbidden to eat them. So, when I managed to buy something from outside the monastery and bring it to my cell, I was also happy. Without being a priest, there were few opportunities to earn money. For example, 50 hryvnias were apparently paid for ringing the bells at a wedding. It was enough to either put the phone down or buy something tasty. More serious needs were met at the expense of the monastery.

We got up at 5:30, except for Sundays and major church holidays (on such days there were two or three liturgies and everyone got up depending on which liturgy they wanted or were scheduled to attend or serve). At 6:00 a.m., the morning monastery prayer began. All brothers, except sick, absent, etc., had to be present. Then at 7:00 a.m. the liturgy began, where the officiating priest, the deacon and the sexton on duty had to remain. The rest are optional.

 

At that time I would either go to the office for obedience or return to the cell to sleep for a few more hours. At 9 or 10 in the morning (I don’t remember exactly) there was a breakfast that you didn’t have to attend. At 1 o’clock or 2 p.m. there was a lunch with the obligatory presence of all the brothers. During the lunch, the biographies of the saints whose memory was celebrated that day were read and important announcements were made by the monastic authorities. At 17:00, the evening service began, followed by dinner and the evening monastic prayer. The sleeping time was not regulated in any way, but if any of the brothers overslept the next morning, they were sent to him with a special invitation.

Once I had the opportunity to conduct the funeral service of a hieromonk. He was very young. A little older than me. I didn’t even know him in my lifetime. It is said that he lived in our monastery, then left somewhere and was banned. And so he died. But of course the funeral service was conducted as a priest. So, all our brothers read the Psalter at the grave around the clock. My duty happened once in the night. In the temple there was only the coffin with the body and me. And so many hours until the next one replaced me. There was no fear, although I remembered Gogol several times, yes. Was it a pity? I don’t even know. Life and death are not in our hands, so sorry – don’t be sorry… I just hoped that he would have time to repent before he died. Like each of us, we need to be on time.

Rookie jokes

On Easter, after a long fast, I was so hungry that I ran across the street to McDonald’s without waiting for a communal holiday meal. Right in the cassock! I and everyone else had this opportunity and no one commented. By the way, many dressed in civilian clothes when leaving the monastery. I have never parted with my clothes. Living in the monastery, I simply had no secular clothing at all, except for jackets and trousers, which had to be worn under a cassock in cold weather to keep from freezing.

In the monastery itself, one of the pastimes of the novices was to fantasize about who would be given what name during the toning. Usually only the person performing the tonsure and the reigning bishop know him until the last moment. The novice himself will learn about his new name only under the scissors, so we made a joke: we found the most exotic church names and called each other with them.

And punishments

For systematic delay, they could be put in bows, in the most difficult cases – on the sole (a place next to the altar) in front of the parishioners, but this was done extremely rarely and was always justified.

It happened that someone left for several days without permission. A priest did this once. They returned him directly over the phone with the help of the governor. But again, all such incidents were like children’s pranks in a large family. Parents can scold, but nothing more.

A funny incident happened to one of the workers. The worker is a layman, a secular person who came to work in the monastery. He is not one of the brothers of the monastery and has no obligations to the monastery, except general ecclesiastical and civil obligations (do not kill, do not steal, etc.). An employee can leave at any moment or, on the contrary, become a novice and follow the path of a monastery. So a worker was stationed at the entrance of the monastery. A friend came to the abbot and said: “What a cheap parking lot you have at the monastery!” And it’s absolutely free there! It turned out that this same worker took money from visitors for parking. Of course, he was severely reprimanded for this, but not kicked out.

The hardest thing

When I first visited, the abbot warned me that real life in the monastery was different from what was written in biographies and other books. Prepared me to take off my rose colored glasses. This means that to some extent I was warned about the negative things that could happen, but I was not prepared for everything.

As in any other organization, there are of course many different people in the monastery. There were also those who tried to curry favor with their superiors, became arrogant in front of their brothers, etc. For example, one day a hieromonk who was under ban came to us. That is, the ruling bishop temporarily banned him from performing sacred duties as punishment (usually until repentance) for some offense, but the priesthood itself was not removed. This father and I were the same age and at first we became friends and talked about spiritual matters. Once he even drew a kind caricature of me. I still carry it with me.

The closer it got to lifting his ban, the more I noticed that he was becoming more and more arrogant towards me. He was appointed as the assistant vestryman (the priest is responsible for all liturgical vestments) and I was the sexton, i.e. in the performance of my duties I was directly subordinate to both the vestryman and his assistant. And here, too, it became apparent how he began to treat me differently, but the apotheosis was his demand to address him as you do after the ban was lifted.

For me, the most difficult things are not only in monastic life, but also in secular life, submission and work discipline. In the monastery it was absolutely impossible to communicate on equal terms with fathers of a higher rank or position. The hand of the authorities was visible always and everywhere. It is not only and not always the governor or the dean. It can be the same saristan and anyone who is above you in the monastic hierarchy. Whatever happened, no later than an hour later, they knew about it at the very top.

Although among the brothers there were those with whom I found a great common language, despite not only the huge distance in the hierarchical structure, but also the significant age difference. Once I came home on vacation and really wanted to meet the then Metropolitan of Minsk, Filaret. I thought about my future fate and really wanted to consult him. We met often when I took my first steps in the church, but I was not sure if he would remember me and accept me. By chance, there were many venerable Minsk priests in line: deans of large churches, high priests. And then the Metropolitan comes out, points at me and calls me into his office. Ahead of all the abbots and high priests!

He listened to me attentively and then spoke at length about his monastery experience. He spoke for a very long time. When I left the office, the entire line of high priests and abbots looked at me very askance, and one abbot, whom I knew from old times, said to me in front of everyone: “Well, you stayed there so long that you should have left there with a panagia.” .The Panagia is a badge of honor worn by bishops and superiors.The line laughed, the tension released, but then the Metropolitan’s secretary swore profusely that I had taken up the Metropolitan’s time so long.

Tourism and emigration

Months passed and absolutely nothing happened to me in the monastery. I really wanted tonsure, ordination and further service in the priesthood. I won’t hide it, I also had ambitions to be a bishop. If at the age of 14 I longed for ascetic monasticism and complete detachment from the world, at the age of 27 one of the main motives for entering a monastery was episcopal consecration. Even in my mind, I kept picturing myself in the episcopal position and in the episcopal robes. In the monastery, one of my main obediences was work in the governor’s office. The office processed documents for the ordination of some seminarians and other protégés (candidates for holy orders), as well as for the monastic tonsure of our monastery.

Many protégés and candidates for monastic vows passed through me. Some went from layman to hieromonk before my eyes and were ordained in the parish. As I said, absolutely nothing happened to me! And in general it seemed to me that the governor, who was also my confessor, alienated me to some extent from himself. Before entering the monastery, we were friends and communicated. When I came to the monastery as a guest, he constantly took me on trips. When I arrived at the same monastery with my belongings, it seemed to me at first that the governor had been replaced. “Don’t confuse tourism with emigration,” some colleagues joked. This is largely why I decided to leave. If I had not felt that the governor had changed his attitude towards me, or at least understood the reason for such changes, I might have remained in the monastery. And so I felt unnecessary in this place.

From the beginning

I had access to the Internet, I could consult very experienced clergy on any matter. I told everything about myself: what I want, what I don’t want, what I feel, what I’m ready for and what I’m not. Two priests advised me to leave.

I left very disappointed, resentful of the governor. But I do not regret anything and I am very grateful to the monastery and the brothers for the experience I have gained. When I left, the governor told me that he could have tonsured me five times as a monk, but something prevented him.

When I left, there was no fear. There was such a leap into the unknown, a feeling of freedom. This is what happens when you finally make a decision that feels right.

I started my life completely from scratch. When I decided to leave the monastery, I had not only civilian clothes, but also money. Apart from a guitar, a microphone, an amplifier and his personal library, there was nothing at all. I brought it with me from the worldly life. Mostly they were church books, but there were also secular ones. I agreed to sell the first ones through the monastery shop, the others I took to the book market in the city and sold them there. So I got some money. Several friends also helped – they sent me money transfers.

The abbot of the monastery gave money for a one-way ticket (in the end we made peace with him. Vladyka is a wonderful person and a good monk. Communicating with him even once every few years is a great pleasure). I had to choose where to go: either to Moscow or Minsk, where I lived, studied and worked for many years, or to Tbilisi, where I was born. I chose the last option and after a few days I was on the ship that took me to Georgia.

Friends met me in Tbilisi. They helped me rent an apartment and start a new life. Four months later I returned to Russia, where I live permanently to this day. After long journeys, I finally found my place here. Today I have my own small business: I am a sole trader offering translation and interpretation services and legal services. I remember monastic life fondly.